Despise Expectations

I am confounded on a regular basis as to what this Christian life is supposed to be as opposed to what is has been made to appear like. It makes me reflect on a quote from Brennan Manning: "The institutional church has become a wounder of the healers rather than a healer of the wounded."

It is a quote that is worthy of reflection. A quote fabricated out of let down and hurt. A quote that unfortunately holds a lot of weight.

The greatest and most profound personal moments of true Christian living have come to me in ways that the average seminary in our day and age could never provide. I am, however, grateful for the "seminary" that my wife and I attended in Pittsburgh. It never gave way to ministry being some kind of profession to pursuit or some kind of career goal.

My wife and I attended Dayspring Bible School together and the most informative class we had every day was lunch. You see, the school was a soup kitchen as well. Every day you had school you shared lunch with the hungry and poor. It was a reminder to us in a gentle way of what this is really about. The lesson to learn was not an "us and them" theme but just an "us" theme. Live life together. Share.

It is in the simplest ways of meeting the needs of each other that bring about great relationships that are then built on trust and love and despise expectations of one another.

Despise expectations. There is a lot to learn in this proactive statement. There are no expectations in true love. You love out of giving of self and in turn you expect nothing.

Sounds truthful but what does it look like?

Let's start by going back to the Brennan Manning quote and consider how the institutional church has become a "wounder of the healers". Henri Nouwen also addressed this in a different fashion but based upon the same grounds. He put it something like this: "The opposite of compassionate is competitive."

If you are not lending your heart free of charge so as to pour yourself out as an offering then you are competing for some kind of award like recognition, a title or craving approval from your peers like a heroine addict craves for a fix and seeks out any avenue to get it. I must constantly ask myself these things. Are my intentions to seek attention or to gain Christ and die to myself. There will always be that chance to do either one. And though all of us are capable of choosing poorly we are invited by the love of our Father in heaven to receive Christ especially in our dark hours.

How have I learned so far? Here is a true story about someone that I get to do some things with:

My friend, Jack, meets the homeless on the streets after he works rotating shifts as an industrial mechanic. He cannot sleep knowing that somebody in his neighborhood is out in the cold and this is why I follow Jack. I try to put my feet into Jack's beautiful footprints that go before me because he is living up to true pastoral living by caring and seeking to restore the broken hearts and broken places. He is not some CEO or seminarian. He is just some blue-collar cigarette-smokin' kid of YHWH that loves until it hurts and then loves some more(Mother Teresa said something like that once).

He and his wife opened a little coffee shop with their own money in order to show the love of Jesus. They simply provide coffee and warmth. No agendas saying, "Free coffee if you come to church!" Just come and Jack(overcome by Jesus) will give you some rest and a cup of joe.

So one day a lady came in and sat down. She got herself a cup of coffee and huddled herself up to the coffee bar leaving the distinct impression that she did not want to be bothered. So Jack simply let her be. Then in walked three pastors from some local church that came to "check out" this ministry effort because they heard that Jack was looking for other Christians to help out. I don't think these guys were there for thirty seconds when they took Jack aside and said "Do you know that there's a known prostitute sitting there at the coffee bar?"

Jack stepped back acting dumb and replied, "Where? I can't see her? Show me."

Immediately they said, "Right there! That lady. What kind of place is this that serves known prostitutes?"

And Jack said, "You see her as what she has become but not what she truly is. She is God's precious daughter. In here she gets to be that treasure even if it's only for a few minutes. That's what we do. We give her those few minutes to be that before the next guy gets his hands on her."

So they left and never returned. There was no trophy for them to win. There was only coffee to serve and warmth to provide but no trophies to carry home of victoriously "saving" the hooker. I'm sure they were disappointed to see that there was no platform for them to speak. There was just the opportunity to meet Jesus in the least of these. The chance to listen to God's heart and identify with His plans and purposes.

That's the problem with the evangelical world anymore, too many folks thinking that their sermons or speaking engagements are what people need. Too much of the evangelical world has thrown it's most important tool of evangelism out. That tool: Listening. If we do not listen to our neighbors then compassion has been discarded from our hearts. Fighting for selfish gain wins again.

These guys only knew how to compete and that was evident in the way they saw her. She was not a shiny trophy to be won nor will she ever be. To Jack she is a daughter of the Most High worthy to be served some cream and sugar. To the "upright" she needed to change then she could be served. Three pastors came in as if they were known conquerors deserving to be recognized. But compassion dethroned them. For a few minutes anyway. And because the desire for trophies ruled their motives, they decided that they had to leave their mark somehow and so they wounded the healer. Since they could not win they might as well wound. Wound Jack.

Leaving and not helping out is how you wound the healer. So much of the western world of Christianity has left the healers standing out in the cold simply because there is no glory in this kind of work. And let me tell you this: Some of the best healers of broken folks that I have come across are not Church-going folk. That is another story.

So... what really happened that day?

Answer:
1) God's beloved daughter sat quietly and contently while sipping on a warm beverage in the peaceful setting of a coffee house designed especially to bring her rest.

2) Three pastors warred with their own discontent because there were no "lands" to take for their kingdoms. In other words: No stories of their soul-winning to tell at the next Sunday service. Hopefully they will recognize Jesus the next time they head out. Hopefully, I will too.

3) And Jack... well, Jack simply despised expectations and brewed up another pot.